Thursday, July 21, 2011

It's Like Walking Onto A Yacht.

So the other day, I got this little invite to join “Google +”. I think the only thing interesting about this site is that you have to be cordially invited to join like it’s some elite club. No idea how I made the cool list and got an invite. Actually, I have no idea what the site is, but whatever. Best I can tell it's Google's attempt at a Facebook duplicate...with circles. So, upon initial set up, the only thing I could figure out was how to add one measly little photograph for my display picture. 

As I scrolled through the upteen thousands of pictures I have, it went something like this: dog, dog, two dogs, cat, dogs and cat, kittens, horses, dog, horse, dog, oh, there’s one of Brent, dogs……are you seeing the problem? I couldn’t find one picture of just myself that didn’t involve my face being covered in food and/or me looking like Chunk from The Goonies.  So I did what every girl does when they’re a mature respectable adult 16 and bored with their bestie: OHMYGOSHPHOTOSHOOT!!!!!

I’m not vain. But I feel as though I am entitled to a couple good shots that I’m not like “well whatever, my husband thinks I’m hot while covered in marshmallow/dog hair/horse poop, who cares what other people think”.

And  I am DEFINITELY not one of those girls that has a bazillion pictures (usually taken on your phone) of yourself. The typical upward angle with the big eyes trying to pierce the soul of the onlooker OR the downward stare to the floor that throws your attempt at being innocent down the toilet. Don’t forget the arm. In order for this to be considered a true picture of vainness, it must contain your arm, or at least a portion of it. Preferably you’re upper half above the elbow.  So for the love of pete, please don’t forget your arm. '


It looks a little something like this:



or this 


or this

hee...heee...oh wait....woops

Ok, so every girl is entitled to at least one of these. 




Ahem.

My excuses were as follows: The gap between my “done up days” compared to the days I do nothing for myself are getting greater and greater. Speaking of that, I responded to an ambulance call with no makeup and my hair in a ponytail. Which works for any naturally beautiful girl… It wasn’t my hottest moment, I’ll admit, but I was saving lives folks!  There’s no time for makeup and an updo while I’m giving CPR!  Anyway, a fellow  EMT thought it would be flattering for him to tell me I must be having "one of those days”. It’s ok, ‘cause my ugly days are way better than his normal days. Ha…ha.  I can’t help it if I happen to look like a 12 year while taking your blood pressure and sewing your arm back on. My bad.  If you'd rather trade beauty secrets with the medic while they’re helping you, please let me know. I’ll be sure to take my time curling my eye lashes…which I never do normally.

Excuse number dos: My coconspirator was Sophie, and like every young pretty girl, you can never have enough pictures of yourself, so I dragged her along.  Meh anyway, here goes nothing. 







Notice the lack of any food anywhere near or on my face my face. 

to see more of our adventures, check out my facebook!